Boyfriend Duck

I was out of town on business after work on day and strolled down to the local park which has active wild life.

This time in particular, I was looking to let others feed the ducks while I shared bread with the local beaver couple who lived there. I call them ‘Mr. and Mrs’. I sat by the edge of the pond waiting for the ‘Mrs’ to show up, letting the ducks pass. A few cute mallards walked by. We exchanged polite greetings. The mallards were followed by a different species of duck.

These ducks were white with a beet-red mass of gnarly bumps of tumor-looking skin surrounding their beak. At first I was visually taken aback and in an instant, out I thought, “hmm. That’s kinda ugly.”

This surprised me because quite frankly, I hang out with toads. It was a fleeting thought and trying to be gentle with myself had to remember that I cannot completely escape my societal influcences, which values more than anything a smooth, wrinkleless appearance. I laughed. Besides, I know what is in my heart. So, I looked up at the lovely lady duck in front of me.

However, as if having heard that thought about her being ugly, the lady duck stopped still in front of me. She poignantly blinked once and then stretched her head a little higher, turned and waddled on. She had chosen to gracefully ‘ignore’ the comment.

Her boyfriend, however, well… that was a different story. He rushed forward, stopped, looked me square in the eyes and proceeded to let me have it.

It sounded something like this:

“Waack weraaaakk Rwarkkk! Rwreerkck! Wreireck ererck requeck er awrecht! Waearck. BPpthepeft!”

And translated emotionally into something like this:

THAT was rude! She is BEAUTIFUL! She is ABSOLUTELY beautiful. ‘YOU’ are the one who is UGLY.”

And he ended with giving me a raspberry:


He then did a fast waddling stomp to further make his point and to catch up with his woman.

I paused and thought, “Wow. I just got told off by a duck.”

I was greatly impressed at that and what a great boyfriend he was, defending his woman and all. It was quite touching.

In addition, he was right. And he had no qualms telling off a human. I like that in a duck.

I said to him what was in my heart, “You are right. I am sorry. She IS beautiful. She is absolutely beautiful.”

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