Boyfriend Duck

December 4, 2011

I was out of town on business and after work, strolled down to the local park which has active wild life. This time in particular, I was looking to let others feed the ducks while I shared with the beaver couple. I call them Mr. and Mrs. I sat by the edge of the pond waiting for the Mrs. to show up, letting the ducks pass. A few cute mallards walked by. We exchanged greetings. They were followed by a different species of duck.

These ducks were white with a mass of beet-red gnarly bumps of tumor-looking skin surrounding their beak. At first I was visually taken aback and in an instant, out I thought, “hmm. That’s kinda ugly.”

That thought surprised me because quite frankly, I hang out with toads. It was a fleeting thought and trying to be gentle with myself had to remember that I cannot completely escape my societal influcences, which values more than anything a smooth, wrinkleless tan appearance. I laughed. Besides, I know what is in my heart. So, I looked up at the lovely lady duck.

However, as if having heard that thought about her being ugly, the lady duck stopped still in front of me. She poignantly blinked once and then stretched her head a little higher, turned and waddled on. She had chosen to gracefully ‘ignore’ the comment.

Her boyfriend, however, well… he rushed forward, stopped, looked me square in the eyes and proceeded to let me have it.

It sounded something like this:

“Waack weraaaakk Rwarkkk! Rwreerkck! Wreireck ererck requeck er awrecht! Waearck. BPpthepeft!”

And translated emotionally into something like this:

“THAT was rude! She is BEAUTIFUL! She is absolutely beautiful. YOU are the one who is UGLY.”

And ended with giving me a raspberry:

“BPpthepeft!”

He then did a fast waddling stomp to further make his point and to catch up with his woman.

I paused and thought, “Wow. I just got told off by a duck.”

I was greatly impressed at that and what a great boyfriend he was being, defending his woman and all. It was quite touching.

In addition, he was right. And he had no qualms telling off a human. I like that in a duck.

I said to him what was in my heart, “You are right. I am sorry. She IS beautiful. She is absolutely beautiful.”

 

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Ladybug

December 4, 2011

My 12-year-old black lab and companion, Kelsey, had recently passed. I was trying to distract myself with work in the office. Mattie, my 1-year-old lab, somehow conveyed to me that she was missing Kelsey. I stopped what I was doing and took some time to be with her.

I hugged her in consoling efforts…maybe I was projecting. I don’t know. I tried to convey to Mattie that I missed Kelsey too but, that she was still here in spirit and that she loved us.  I started to cry.

I sat there for a while with her, hugging Mattie, missing my girl, Kelsey.

Then at some point I took a deep breath and I turned back to my work.

There on my pants leg was a ladybug that was not there moments before. I greeted the Ladybug with a ‘Hello’. The ladybug proceeded to crawl on my hand. She crawled and crawled and crawled. I tried to keep it on my hand to take it outside, as I do with most insects.

This was a particularly cute ladybug and I went outside and sat with it for a moment to get some comfort in my sadness. I am always looking to connect with an insect. I was missing Kelsey. I was remembering the black butterfly encounters, happy for them but wishing there had been more.

The ladybug kept crawling and would occasionally fly down to other fingers on my hand and crawl back up them…. crawl back down…fly back…crawl down…. fly back up. She did not fly away. She was very affectionate. She flew on my shirt and crawled up it, then back on my hand.

She was playful in way that I knew intimately. I thought in a brief moment of my sadness, wouldn’t be nice if she sat over my heart. No sooner did the thoughts float out of my head, that the ladybug did just that. She sat there several minutes facing me, sitting still on my chest….just as I had wished.

And then I knew.

I knew like I knew I was breathing.

It was my girl.  It was my Kelsey.

We had a nice visit and I wept. I was painfully thankful.

She said ‘I came like this because you used to call me ‘Ladybug’.

I wept hard, and even harder still, but in a happy, deep, thankful way. A way that stretched my depth of understanding, love and connection.

I love her and her gentle, sweet, tender, playful influence and guidance in my life.

Summer 2005

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Roly Poly

November 15, 2011

This story is for anyone who has ever felt different.

I went to visit with a toad friend of mine, where the water is set out for him.

He was not there.

I called for him and reached out for a stone in the water.

I held the stone in my hand closely, speaking with my heart.

The stone became warm.

I felt a heartbeat, mine or its , I do not know.

Then I noticed crawling on the brick, a roly-poly…

an albino roly-poly.

I said ‘Hello’,

then,

‘You are an albino’.

She said “yes.”

“You are different from all of the other roly polies.

She said ‘yes.”

“I feel different from all of the humans.”

She said ‘yes.”

I wondered how she dealt with it.  I mean, being a part of something, yet being so different.

All of the other roly-polies are the same.

“How?  How do I say I am different, yet the same?”

“Yes, you have special talents and gifts to share. Yet, your being different does not take away from their being unique.”

Each are different and unique, in different and unique ways. Some are more externally obvious than others,  some not.

“As well, your being different does not erase your commonness.”

There is always a common thread amongst you… all of us, really.

“I am drastically unique in my expression of a roly-poly, yet I am still undoubtedly a roly-poly.”

My  message to all is:
‘Delight in your uniqueness, in a foundation of your similarities.”

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Wolf Honoring

November 2, 2011

 For those that wish, please join in this Wolf Honoring Ceremony by taking a moment to say a loving prayer and hold sacred space for our wolf family.

 

Wolf Honoring, Loving and Protection prayer

Loving wolves, we honor your spirit and send you great love.

Thank you for being here and sharing your wisdom and strength.

Thank you for your love of Mother Earth and all her creatures.

We ask Divine protection to be with you,

and for you feel our love and appreciation.

We honor your presence here on Earth.

We ask for light and love to surround you

and to be in the hearts of all humans.

Please help ease the anger,

and for all to feel the grace of love and compassion.

Help us all to feel your love.

Help us to know our own divinity and for us to shine bright.

Bless the wolves, and bless the humans.

Bless our life in harmony with all.

We ask for love, comfort and protection for all in need.

 

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